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I’m sure we’ve all being there before, that time in a meeting place with friends, old and new, having a joke and a chat. Someone says something mind-blowingly ridiculous, and as a result you and your friends rip that person to shreds to no end. Laughing, you explain to the fool why what they said was so funny. And then you make what will soon to be considered the biggest mistake of your social life. You call them a ‘silly cunt’.
Big mistake. The whole room goes silent. You are looked at like you have strangled an infant. A mixture of rage, tears and unadulterated shock can be seen in the face of everyone within a five-mile radius. Someone is texting a friend in utter disgust, regretting ever having the displeasure of meeting you. The BBC has been informed, and you’re to be on the headlines of the 6 o’clock news. Everyone you know is sure to hear about this, you are forever doomed to a life of seclusion, labelled as the ‘silly cunt guy or girl’.
I’m a cunt. I am a cunt in the same way I’m an idiot, a bastard, an arsehole and a pillock. I am a word used to describe me when I’ve done something stupid or have done something unfair to another individual. I am a cunt and I’m OK with it, I have no qualms whatsoever with that piece of swearing. To me, it is banal as calling someone a ‘foot’. Now if you’re appalled with the leadership of the recently deceased Michael then that’s a different story, but the point that I’m getting at is that, to me, it is in no way the word itself that offends, and simply the delivery of it. Calling someone a cunt and calling someone a cunt are two completely different things. It’s all in the matter of context, and on a completely egalitarian point of view, it’s ridiculous. I’m fairly certain that the majority of you reading this (if you swear that is) would call someone a ‘dick’ or a ‘prick’ at the drop of a hat, so why all this uproar when someone mentions a different genitalia? ‘Twat’ isn’t a bad word; in fact I think it’s a hilarious word. No one ties you to a tree and pummels you with rocks if you mention the word twat, so it seems a little ironic that referencing exactly the same thing but using a different word should cause such upheaval and render you a social pariah.
Personally I think there’s a double standard surrounding the word. I heard a story in sixth form about a general chitchat in class. Someone mentioned the dreaded evil ‘worse than a rapist word’ in conversation and a roomful of people pretty much burned her at the stake. However, in the same class the next day, the supposedly shocked masses continued to sit down for the entire hour and share racist jokes. Silly Cunts.