How to get over your ex (and yourself)

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So you just got dumped, or you just broke up. Hooray for being single! There’s so much to look forward to, such as being able to do whatever you want without worrying about what your other half thinks. You can wear that t-shirt they hate! You can hang out with all your friends they didn’t like! You can sit in your room, alone, staring at the wall, wondering if you’ll ever find love again! OK, so maybe you shouldn’t do that last part. Whoever ended it, readjusting to being single again can be difficult, and you may feel yourself clinging to the past, since nothing else feels as good anymore. Don’t! Take heed of some advice from someone who’s been in this situation before and you’ll be feeling great in no time.

 Have a good cry

 Stick a sad movie on, curl up under a blanket, and let it all out. Or whatever it is that normal people do to cry (I cut onions and shove them into my eyes. True story). There’s probably a really good science reason for crying, but for social science students like myself, it just feels damn good to let all those emotions out in one big wail of angst and sadness. There’s no shame in it. Unless you’re in, like, McDonald’s.

 Get drunk

 “This doesn’t sound very responsible/this only works in the short-term” I hear you cry. Valid points, for sure, but sometimes you just need to let yourself go. Grab some friends, grab some drinks and stop thinking for a night. If there’s anything that’ll take your mind off everything, it’s a tasty mixture of vodka, sambuca and that nasty cola you can get at Spar. Just be wary of becoming an emotional wreck and sobbing into your buddy’s lap before you even get out the door. And try not to make a habit of it – people start to worry about you, and that gets really annoying, really quickly.

 Have a one night stand

What my mother actually said is perhaps a little too vulgar for publication, but this is about the long and short of it.  You’ve been sleeping with the same person for a while (unless you were sleeping with more than one and that’s why you’re now single), so get yourself back out on the scene and go home with someone new. Who knows, maybe they’re better in bed than your ex? Just, please, don’t be stupid. Use protection, be aware of what you’re doing and who you’re with, and let a friend know where you are. I love you guys. Don’t go getting hurt because of things I said.

Don’t expect to be over them in an instant

 This gets truer the longer you’ve been with a person. I’d roughly estimate, from personal experience, that it takes at least a third of the amount of time you were together to properly get over someone. So if you were only dating for a week, good news! You’ll have moved on in a few days. You long-term cats though, you’re stuck with being a mess for a while. Sorry about that. Just remember you’ll be OK eventually, and you’ll meet the next “one” soon enough.

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